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Discussion:
What are some of the barriers for learning disabled people that stop us from having conversations around topics such as sexuality, sex & intimacy, sexual relationships, mate/hate crime, sexual exploitation? What needs to happen to break that?
There is a lack of resources and training. Sometimes our beliefs about sexuality, gender and religion stopping us from having conversations. Fear of risks like “Are we like coaching them?”. Where do we draw that sort of assessment of what is risky and what is essential? There are limitations in assessments, what things are and how we can communicate the best way so that everyone can understand it and apply rules. Another thing to consider is power and balances, as an advocate. Are we crossing that boundary where we are coming across as coaching them rather than giving them that autonomy to make that decision?
It’s important that the advocate themselves need to be comfortable to discuss all those things (sex, intimacy, exploitation ect.) and know to be comfortable in their skin. To create a safe space for the client to open up. Another important consideration is the intersectional perspective in creating an inclusive environment.
There are cases in services that some matters are being addressed whilst others are being silenced.
There is also the medical model and how they see disabled people treated within the health system. How things get overlooked or treatment or prevention gets denied- it’s just not fair for them.
There is a lack of having specific policies on sexual rights.
Because, especially if something is new, the whole notion of helping them to understand new concepts, things like that, is the capacity there to do that.
There is a lack of resources and lack of training. Not only this, but also there is a distinct lack of presence of the media. We don’t see any films of disabled people having sex or kissing. This is what’s lacking, so perhaps we need to work more closely with the media and bring them to their attention how important it is to normalise it among other people.
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Discussion:
What are the steps moving forward?
Bring awareness to training, workshops and go to schools because there may be disabled people who themselves are not aware of their own sexuality.
As an organisation, as advocates, we need to think doing more outreach because there are many people with learning disabilities out there that don’t know about us. We don’t see anyone hardly anyone coming to us because there not aware of us. So it's thinking about how can we make sure the people know this is where you can come to for support. We need to look at that.
There are myths and stigma that manifest themselves within different cultures.
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Discussion:
What will be something to take away from today's workshop?
I will be mindful in future when I see clients who bring up what we discussed today so that we can empower them.
Try to empower them to help them to support them to open up there conversations, because they might want to speak about it they might want to speak about sexuality and intimacy. What it means, how they think how they might feel about being so different to everybody else, like "Yeah like I love somebody I would like to have sex with somebody," you know, "I like it when people come and give me cuddles when I'm intimate with somebody," so it doesn’t have to be sexual advances just intimacy.
We have women sessions at the moment. Group sessions. But I think now that we know how many clients have learning disabilities, we can invite
them to come for training.
I’m hopeful that this will reach out to wider communities and those who are involved already erm to include the wider groups of people. A broader range of media would be good. Use of media is important, because not everybody communicates verbally. So including languages is important. I worked with people in the deaf community.
The language was all about risk and don’t do this, then in contrast that amazing theatre production that was really joyful and celebratory and its
just really nice to think about these issues not just in terms of the negative and the risk but like the empowerment and the joyful aspects of relationships and sexual intimacy.
I've noticed how much it means on people with learning disabilities to actually put themselves out there to make themselves known to have those conversations. To initiate those conversations despite of so many barriers. The people of that theatre group out there- it must have taken them a lot to get there, how many people have that access, right?
So the language that we use in that type of communications, even the silence is a problem… And that’s one of the skills that I need to learn. How to make them comfortable how not to put the onus on them, to actually teach us the language.
Mainstream television too to get to the masses.
What I’m going to take away is to spread the word. I’ve
learnt a lot from just being here and what I’m going to take away is how can i implement a more outreach approach to the work I already do to spread the word so that people with learning disabilities can get access to information.
In the 80s when you have children in need, its shocking. I’m thinking how to get the word out more. It will be a slow burn towards getting everyone in society to think differently around people with learning disabilities.
I feel I lack training lack of basically working with this kind of category of clients because I don’t have much clients with learning disabilities. And also lack of awareness maybe and we need more training we need more kind of like setting up awareness and promote our organisation because you know were the only ones in London I would say in this specific field supporting disabled victims of domestic abuse. Some of the questions aren't disability inclusive in these risk assessments.
Nothing for us without us.
Being more comfortable like about having conversations around sexuality and human rights, not just when its like a lack of disclosure when somethings gone wrong. Being comfortable about having conversations about it.
Being more open and professional beings. Making sure that I’m comfortable so that they also feel comfortable talking about sexuality and relationships healthy relationships.
That balance of speaking to them as a learning disabled
person but not ignoring the humanity, but not allowing the humanity to ignore the fact that there a learning disabled
person, that kind of balance between the two I think, is what I’ve taken away.